#41: Cheez & PB Sammies

Hi hi hi hi hi hi!

These cookies have a very special significance for me.  I took art classes at the local art school when I was a kid.  Every Saturday morning for 4 years.  It was a lot of terrible paintings and charcoals and dumbness.  I never made any friends there because of SOCIAL AWKWARDNESS DISEASE, so the thing I looked forward to the most was the 10am break when I could go to the vending machine and get my cheese and peanut butter crackers.

OFF-TOPIC GRANDMA STORY: I had to drop off a storage tub at my grandma’s this weekend.  My Aunt Adelle was there with her grandkids (my grandma’s great-grandkids) Marianna & Gianna.  They’re like maybe 8 or 9 years old and super cute.  The one – Gianna – is in gymnastics and was showing off her splits.  Grandma (92, wheelchair) looks over and says “when I was younger, I could do a backbend and I could drink out of a water glass on the floor behind me.”  Then she starts to demonstrate the backbend from the wheelchair….  She’s got some moves, y’all.

(What does this story have to do with cookies?  NOTHING!  It’s my blog and I’ll tell you a Grandma story whenever I want!)

Here’s your dang recipe!

For the cheddar biscuit things:

4 ounces shredded cheddar cheese

2 ounces grated parmesan cheese

3/4 cuppa flour

1/2 sticka room temp butter

2 tbsp cold water

Jazz up your cheeses in a food processor until they’re like much smaller cheese bits – like 1 minute.  Throw the cheese bits into a mixer with the flour, butter and water and mix until it’s like a ball of cheese dough.  It should look like color of Emma Stone’s hair in Birdman (which was a terrible movie.  Ugh – so fucking long and boring).  Chill your dough for 30 minutes and then roll super-flat and cut into squares.  Bake your cheese squares for like 11 minutes at 350.  (Tip – I think you need to leave these in a hot oven to dry up/crisp up after the bake.  Just turn the oven off and leave your shits in there for like 10 minutes.  I think I saw this on a show somewhere, or maybe I dreamed it a dream – like an inception.  I never saw that movie, but I guarantee it was better than fucking Birdman.)

For the PB frosting – I just threw together 1/4 sticka melted butter, about 1 cup powdered sugar and three giant blobs of peanut butter (blobs = very heaping spoonfuls).  Just eyeball this….  Then about 4 splashes of milk and a pinch of salt.  Add more peanut butter and maybe some honey, if you feel like it needs it.

OK!  That’s it!  Have a blessed day, y’all!

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