Woof! How about these wigwams, y’all? The first batch looked like a tray of ghost farts. Then my homie Cameron came over with some wine and I made a second batch and – wow – all better!
Before the recipe – I’d like to share a thing that I’ve been obsessed with for the last 2 months (COMPLETELY UNRELATED!). It’s a song called Turkey Lurkey Time and it’s from the musical Promises, Promises. There are only a handful of videos of this song on the internets – they’re all insane. It’s an insane song with bat-shit bonkers dancing. This one is my favorite, but only because it looks like Miss Polanski from Accounts Receivable kicks another girl in the stomach at the 1:40 mark.
FUN FACT! The Gilmore Girls grandma is one of the background dancers!!!! SERIOUSLY – she’s got a white shirt and like a black cardigan and she dances her face off!!!!
OK! Here’s that recipe everyone is talking about!
3 room temp egg whites
1/4 tsp cream of tartar
3/4 cup caster sugar. (This is like super fine sugar, which is regular gran sugar that you snizzle in a food processor for 60 secs).
1/4 tsp vanilla
Ok – the egg whites are made up of strands of so much protein and when you whip the fuck out of them, the protein strands form a network of protein strands. And the network hugs in so much air. It’s like a big bowl of hugged air!
So whip your whites on medium low for about 5 minutes until it’s like a foam. Then plop in the tartar and keep whipping. Whip faster! Add the sugar slowly and whip as fast as you fucking can. You want some stiff old peaks, y’all! (Like whip for about 10 min). Snizzle in some vanilla at the end.
This is a meringue now. Congratulations!
Bloop your meringue into a piping bag or a big old ziploc and cut yourself a big ol tip. (If you want a color situation, add some food coloring to your piping bag. I learned this on the Internet!)
Cook your shits low and slow, babe! That’s like 200 degrees for 2 hours. Paint on some wigwam doors and add toothpicks for wigwam support.
Taste – I have no idea how these are supposed to taste! I’ve honestly never had one before. But it tastes like a crispy marshmallow. Is that right??? 4!
Appearance – I think pretty cute, right? I’m giving myself a 7 on these! SEVEN!