I started reading the new David Sedaris book this summer – Theft By Finding. It’s a collection of his journal entries from 1977 to 2002. It’s fascinating. Homeboy was a druggie fuck-up for the first few years of his 20s. I guess he’s covered this pretty well in his other books, but it’s described in much greater detail in these journals – it feels way realer.
I love these stories about how famous people had rough starts. It’s so much more relatable that people need to sort their shit out before becoming really really awesome. There was something on Facebook recently about how like Tina Fey and Oprah were complete goons before they figured out what they were good at. It makes me really happy to think there might be an end to my goon phase soon.
Anyway – I’ve been in a Sedaris k-hole lately. I reread Naked and am now mid-Theft By Finding. And I’m on a steady rotation of pre-sleep Amy Sedaris on late night talk show videos. Here’s her last appearance on Letterman – skip to the 4:00 mark for the song that she wrote that I’m completely in love with. Boom clank boom-clank! and click HERE for my favorite ever bit. It’s so dumb, but it makes me laugh EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
OK – none of that has ANYTHING to do with these cookies. NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO MATCH, OK?
OH! Wait a minute! Amy Sedaris talks about her pet rabbits in most of her Letterman interviews! THERE’S THE CONNECTION!!!!!!!! YES!!!!! Volpi Victory!!!!
Here’s your dang recipe (it’s a variation on this here Martha Stewart recipe!):
2 stick, melted butter
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup gran sugar
1 egg yolk
1 cup flour
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp ginger
3/4 kosher salt
3/4 cup grated carrots
3/4 rolled oats
*NOTE – Aunt Martha calls for golden raisins, but FUCK RAISINS. That’s how I feel, OK???? Add them if you want, y’all!
Mix this shit together.
OK – now find two handfuls of pecans and chop them up real good. Roll carrot cake/cookie doughballs in your chopped up pecans. Make rabbit faces and bake at 350 for 22 min. At the 10 min mark, jab your thumb in the face area. That’s where the face goes.
Make a cream cheese frosting! It’s like 1 stick butter + 2 tsp cream cheese + 1/4 powder sugar that’s whipped up in a whipping machine.
Blop cream cheese frosting blobs in the face areas once the cookies have cooled a tic. Then make rabbit faces. That’s it!!!! I used tiny bits of carrot for the NOSES!!!! Squirt!