Hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi!!!
I’m back in Columbus and back to work and just want to cry my eyes out that Christmas is over and I’m not in Canada anymore.
Real talk – Canadian dudes are probably the handsomest dudes in the world!
Would y’all like a quicko Montreal rundown?
Yay! Ok! Me too!
First off – if you decide you want to go, do NOT go the week between Christmas and New Years. Half the city is closed down and it will be so cold that your nips just jump right off your body.
We didn’t know this when we booked the trip, so we made the most of it! We saw the big Notre Dame cathedral and had some Montreal bagels and a choco babka and a poutine! We went to the Olympic park and saw sloths and otters at the Biodome! We saw the Call Me By Your Name movie in a French movie theater and the Italian bits were subtitled in French and we had no idea what was happening!
(SIDEBAR 1- every single thing about that movie was the best! Remember when the kid found Hunkotron 3000’s swim trunks and put them on his head??? Yeah! I SURE REMEMBER THAT!)
Speaking of plum smugglers, the best place for banana hammocks and marble sacks in the world is SIMON’S department store (thanks for the tip, @pauldotey!). In fact the whole store was so good and so busy and I loved it!
So now I’m back and medium weepy that work is happening again and I just don’t have the money to be a Leisure Larry who spends his dumb oil tycoon dad’s money on yacht parties and calf implants. (SIDEBAR 2 – my calves are plenty meaty as it is! MEATY CALVES CALVIN, that’s my new name!)
Anyway – I had a bunch of dumb baking ingredients left in the cabinets and thought I would just get to gettin and make some cookies. Listen – these guys aren’t going to set the world on fire. They’re just choco chip cookies with molasses and espresso powder and sprinkles. They taste like how I look in Canada (I’m a Canada 6!).