#108: fucking great brownies, y’all

img_3920Hi hi hi hi hi hi hi!

Quick story – I was walking into the cookie sprinkle store last night, slipped on some ice and dropped my phone.  (I was in the middle of texting Clare about a trip to Prague that we may or may not be taking in September.  STAY TUNED!)  Anyway – the phone fell and is now completely destroyed.


Oh my god – I’m devastated!  MY PHONE is my everything, y’all!  It’s what I look at right before bed and first thing in the morning.  I keep all of my business ideas in the Notepad and have so many photos and texts saved on it.  IF YOU MUST KNOW, it’s how I met Jimmy – and basically how we fell in love.  It’s ridiculous, but losing my phone is really a giant disaster and I hate not having it here right now as I type up this lame blog.

I’m getting a new one later today, but I’ve been without my phone for about 8 waking hours now and I’m swirling the poop-drain.

(PS – I got the sprinkles, but I could only find two of the colors I needed.  I couldn’t find the third color and that’s ANOTHER OF MY VERY SERIOUS FIRST WORLD PRIVILEGED WHITE MAN PROBLEMS!  #thoughtsandprayers).

Honestly – it feels good to express these emotions.  I can’t keep my feelings bottled up anymore!!!  (This reminds me of a very good joke that Christopher Walken once told: Imagine we’re in a bar.  What’s the difference between the place we’re in right now and an elephant’s fart?

One’s a bar-room.  The other’s a BAROOOOOOOOMMM!)

I love that joke and I love YOU for reading this blog.  Oh – I also love brownies.  I made some brownies on Sunday for dinner at my sister’s house and guess what….  THEY WERE DELICIOUS.

Here’s your dumb recipe.

4 eggs

1-1/4 cup dark cocoa

1 tsp espresso powder

I tsp salt

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp vanilla

2 sticks butter

2-1/4 cups gran sugar

1-1/4 cup flour

Ok y’all! This one is fun to make. I SWEAR!

Find a mixer and mix up the eggs, cocoa powder, espresso powder, baking powder (so many powders) vanilla and salt. I like dark cocoa powder, champ – because regular cocoa is for idiotburgers. Also – try a kosher salt or a sea salt – I bet it’s way better with a chunkier salt crystal.

While this is happening, melt your butter and sugar until butter is melted and sugar is dissolved. Pour your hot sugary butter mix into the egg/cocoa situation and mix for like another minute. Then mix in the flour. Honestly – this takes maybe about 10 minutes total from start to finish. TEN FUCKING MINUTES!

Dig out your 9×13 pan and get that shit greased up and maybe also put in a greased up sheet of parchy paper. Spread in your brownie batter and cook that shit for 30-35 min at 350.

Cool these completely before your cut and frost.

While your shits are baking / cooling, make a simple baileys Irishbutter cream frosting. It’s like a half stick butter, a cup? of powdered sugar (I’ve given up measuring), two splashes of milk and maybe a splash and a half of baileys.

Aw shit! These are so fucking good, y’all!

2 thoughts on “#108: fucking great brownies, y’all”

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